Saturday, December 6, 2008

Trying to get clean with methadone treatment. Using benzo's tho. I hate being an addict. SOMETIMES!

Today I used, both benzo's and baby blues. Baby blues here in Hawaii are short for 30mgs instant release Oxycodone. I spent 100 dollars, on these pills. I had to shoot up five to feel anything.
After I got the pills, I bought some clean rigs, and a pill crusher. I got on a bus home, to use the baby blues. I was so anxious to use, that I almost got caught by my parents for getting it ready in my room, without the door locked. So as soon as my that happened, I put the works away, and waited. I looked at my email, did some blog reading, and whatnot. Then when I figured my parents were asleep, or close to, I went into the bathroom to wash my face, brining my works in with me.
From there I sat on the floor, and proceeded to go about the ritual. Crush the pills, put in spoon, fill syringe with water, squirt the water into the spoon, carefully trying not to push out the water too fast, and cause the pills to be sprayed all over the floor. Then when you have the water and the pills in the spoon, you light a lighter under the spoon and wait for it to boil. When it boils clear, your ready to put the cotton in, and suck up the concoction in the syringe. After that you run the syring under cold water, and then tie off, find a vien, and insert the needle of the syringe, and pull back until you see that black blood rush in, and then you push the plunger in and wait. 10 seconds later theres that feeling. That feeling nothing compares too. Except maybe heaven if heaven really did exsist.

So now I've opened pandora's box.

So I'm gonna go take another shot.

1 comment:

Sarah Budweiser said...

I found you my friend and look forward to reading both your blogs. Love Sarah B.