The final decision has been made. I will be staying in Wisconsin while my parents move to Hawaii for three months aka 90 days. I will be visiting them the second month they are there. My counselor said this was OK. I have to be at a stable dose, and when I get to Hawaii it will be mandatory that I take my pshycotropic drugs in front of the nurse at the Clinic in Hawaii. The clinic in Hawaii is called Ku Aloha Ala Mau formally known as D.A.S.H. (drug addiction services of Hawaii)
This is my best chance to prove to my parents that I can live on my own and flourish. I will stay away from all illegal drugs, I will take my medication for Bi Polar, and I will be on Nurti-System, so I when I go visit my parents in Hawaii I will be thin. Thinking thin. I bought a smaller size bikini and pinned it to my wall. So every time I go into the kitchen and am going to eat comfort food I am seeing that bikini that I want to wear in Hawaii and will walk away from the kitchen with an apple instead of a candy bar.
Also my Physcitrist will be prescribing me Ritalin which takes away my appetite completely, and makes me want to exercise. The down side is it keeps me from sleeping much, and it makes my thoughts race, as if I was having a manic episode. There is a lot of differing opinions about weather a Bi Polar should be put on amphetamines, some in the field think it brings on sever manic episodes, which in turn brings on even worse depressive episodes. Some think as long as its taken appropriately it would keep a Bi Polar stable along with the mood stabilizers, and the Risperdone for my delusional thinking, and my Clonazepam for my panic attacks, and Lexapro for depression, and Thryroxin for my thyroid problem.
While my parents are gone, I have two months to think about where I'm going to live after they get home. I will also be saving the money I'm getting from Social Security Disability. My parents offered to pay for my rent, my T.V. and my Internet. For food I'll be on Nurti-system. I will still get food stamps, but I won't have any need for them, so if I can find somebody willing to pay me cash for my food stamps. I think I could talk a Friend into using my food stamps and buying their food with it, and giving me 90 dollars for 115 dollars worth of groceries, put that money in the bank with the 675+85+90=806 dollars if my calculations are right. I'm terrible at math so please don't rag on me if I'm wrong. I don't have a calculator handy. So when I go to Hawaii I will have saved up 1,612 dollars. That would be put in the bank in Hawaii(if I decide to stay after my parents come back to Wisconsin) and I would put the four hundred + four hundred and seventy five a month in the bank every month, and use the rest as petty cash. I will also have food stamps so my eating money is taken care of. The 200 in petty cash will go towards the sliding scale fee for my stay at the hostel. If you stay in a hostel for over a month you start having to pay a sliding scale fee. Depending on how much you make from SSI and welfare, you have to pay a sliding scale fee for rent. I just remember that today. I could also buy a tent and live in one of the homeless beach cites. That always seemed like fun to me. A tent on a beach in a community of homeless families. Sure you have your crazy person, and drug addict in the little homeless communities, but most are just Native Hawaii people who can't afford rent after the Japanese took over and built all these expensive high rise apartments. I could also look for a nanny job that pays cash. Hopefully a live in nanny. So I could put away all my money and live off my cash pay
I keep falling asleep. So that's about it for now. I will probably blog latter on today about something totally different. Your probably sick of hearing about my parents moving to Hawaii, and what I might do when I get there.
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