Going from junk high to junk sickness is perhaps a little like transforming from a plant into an animal. Plants don't need emotions, pain, or sex. When your high you don't feel any of those things. Getting off junk your turning back into an animal, which needs emotions, pain, and sex. So the cells are shifting or dying when your going thru withdrawals. When a junky is full of junk or on the nod they look dead and feel nothing, what I imagine a plant feels like, or rather lacks feeling. A non Junky looks alive, does and feels things. So getting high every day is like dying and coming back to life a little bit until you take your next shot.
That's what I'm thinking death is like. Its like being high. That is if there is a soul or whatever you'd like to call it. If there is no soul then being dead is like being in a dreamless sleep.
I'm not fixated on death today, I just was reading Junky and he gave me this theory. He has science behind his theory, unlike mine.
Actually I'm feeling manic lately. My pep pills are working better now that I'm off the Methadone, and I drink a lot of coffee. Grind my teeth.
I really fucking hate the cold weather, I want to be in Hawaii, and should be. If my mom didn't like where she lived so much we would be in Hawaii in a week. December they were suppose to move .
I can't blog much, I have to go to Shopko to pick up my Suboxone.
I wonder what you think being dead is like, and if its comparable to being high? I imagine religious people will say heaven and hell, depending how you lived your life. Since I lived mine addicted to a substance hells fire shall burn eternal of my soul. I was saved, remember, at curves by a lady who thought I needed to be saved right at that moment. I don't know if that's in this blog, or on my old myspace blog.