I think its time for me to come clean. I never relapsed. I'm actually only taking four mgs of Suboxone now. Thats down from 16mgs a day. The reason I lied is because I had nothing to write about. Now that I don't have an addiction to write about, and now that I no longer want to use its not fun to write about using. I had one small relapse, and from there I just took it too far. I lied to everyone on here. I appreciate everyone who has given me support through what they thought were troubled times.
In fact I have been doing very well. I'm in a journalism class at NWTC. I'm saving my money to go to Hawaii where I can get a degree in English Lit. I"m torn between here in Green Bay, and going to Hawaii. This winter has really had me in the mood for Hawaii.
I appoligze to Gledwood, BMelonsLeomonade, Elizabeth, and everyone else who reads this blog. I know your thinking is she lieing now, and I know this is going to cause me to loose a lot of readers. I just don't have big problems anymore. Except maybe my moods, but thats nothing compared to my addiction. At least in terms of exciting to read about. My moods are actaully a problem, and I am going to a Duel Diagnosis treatment facility on Feb. 20th. But thats just to get off the Suboxone, and get my Bi Polar meds under control.
Gledwood I'm so sorry. In a way I'll always love Heroin, but I no longer need it in my life. I'm no longer a junky whore. I do play with Eleanor. I never moved out of my parents house. I never dissapointed them. In fact I've made them proud, by choosing to better my life with school, and treatment. I would say I still have an addiction to benzos, but compared to my Heroin addiction I find it small by comparison.
I can't appoligize enough to everyone. From now on I'm going to be brutally honest. The name of my blog is lie. I'm not strung out again. I still hate my face, and hate this place. At least for the time being. When summer comes along I might just enjoy it again.
Haters bring it on. Dissapointed readers bring it on. I have it comming to me.
Right now I'm jelous of my friends, all of which are working at good jobs, having kids. I'm stuck in this nowhere land, where I can't bring myself to land a man. I feel like working on myself before I start to think about a man, but I'm 28. I don't have a lot of time to snag a man. That's why I hang on Gledwood. He's going through something similar to me, and I understand what he writes about.
I'm still a trainwreak.