Monday, March 14, 2011

Just some words, non of it wisdom

I haven't spoken a word to another human being in two full days. My parents didn't call over the weekend, and I didn't call them. I think that both Eleanor and I are depressed. All I do is clean, even if everything is clean, I clean it again. I go to the gym and go to the movie theater with all the treadmills in it, and I work out in there, where no-one talks to you.

I've been off of Suboxone for almost a month or more, and I'm craving me some opiates. Just to get high once would be nice. Take some of the sadness away. I'm working really hard on my Weight Watchers program.

On Friday my mom called and told me that she and my father both got memberships to Golds gym too. At least when I go back out to Yuma AZ, in April I will be able to work out at the gym. Oh yes, this reminds me, there is free tanning at Golds gym, and I went in for ten minutes, and I'm sunburned. Of course my face didn't get any color, just radiation, more wrinkles. I just wanted a base tan for when I go out to AZ.

I guess you guys want to know how much I weigh, I'm 5"7 and 215.  One person got it close, but thought I was 5"5 and 215. Oh yes, and this week I went up three pounds. I think its because I have my period. I know eeww gross.

Since me and Elle are alone so often, she lays by the door and waits for mom or dad to walk in. If I say out loud, MOM or DAD, she goes nuts.

Daylight savings happened on Saturday night. We sprang forward. So instead of getting up at 6am I now get up at 7am. That Methadone schedule really tuned in my internal alarm clock. I guess going to dose before nine thirty am every day except for Sundays has made me an older person. You know because older people get up early and go to bed early.


the guy in the silk taffeta dress said...

You know what ?
I think you're pretty hardy material to get by 2 days without human contqact.
Yeah, I couldn't do it without feeling a bit sad.
Good for you Anna! !! ! !

the guy in the silk taffeta dress said...

I like your determination.
I don't think you have much weight to lose, but just sticking to any goals is commendable.
Keep up your goals :)

Anonymous said...

I said 5'7" 215, not 5'5"! I should get a prize :)
I was able to guess because we look like we're around the same size, but I figured I was taller than you (I'm 5'9"). You'll look perfect in 6 months or so, losing 1-2 lbs a week. I know it's hard, especially when you're alone, but you can do it. I've been doing the South Beach diet, and have been losing weight pretty easily. Of course, so far this only means I need to buy smaller bras, not smaller pants but life's a bitch sometimes.

Gledwood said...

Yeah Anna you really do sound like you're focused which is good keep on and don't be guilty if you miss a day or whatever. You ought to just carry on on on doing what you're doing and you will see progress. I want to do exercise but dont even know where to start. I wanted to do boxing but they'd laugh at me in there and really i just want to hit the bag not people you know the little one that comes back at you and the one from the ceiling that you go at with a rhythm. I would like to do swimming but again body issues people think they're exclusively female. Fuck it I'm going to go and do that swimming I don't care. I know a really good swimming pool I could go to with waves and all. Fuck it Anna you know what you inspired me to go do something for once SWIMMING ha ha!!