This is my 403rd post. I suck at writing. I'm embarrassed of my book. I'm negative 27 points on my weight watchers points plus. I'm doing a lot of working out to make up those points. I have only one reader now... a shout out to Gledwood.
I lost a lot of readers when I lied about my relapse. Now if I ever do relapse no body will believe me. It sure as hell would make this blog a lot more interesting.
I flew back last night. I'm back in Wisconsin, and I come back in a snow storm. FUCK ME! Me and Eleanor are just getting used to being alone. I have to go see my shrink tomorrow about my melt down in Yuma AZ. Oh fuck, my life is so not interesting. I don't even know why I blog. Like anyone out there gives a flying fuck what I did today or any other day. Unless that is I got real high. Then people would be commenting how horrible I am.
Not being on Heroin, Methadone, or Suboxone is strange. I want to get high in the worst way. Now that my parents are gone I could use and nobody would know the difference. The reason I don't use is because mainly I don't want to hurt my parents. Second I don't want to go back to jail. Fuck me I want to move to
Amsterdam. It may not be legal, but at least its decriminalized. I wish I could go back to when I started using and get that euphoric feeling from taking one 5mg Percocet. Now it takes me 10 to feel nothing. All I'm doing is hurting my liver.
I'm going back to Yuma AZ April 8th with my aunt Debbie. We are going to spend at least 10 days out there. I only bought a one way ticket. I plan on buying a one way ticket home.