Friday, June 24, 2011

Sorry

I'm sorry. I've pissed off a lot of people, worried people, and hurt people. This was not a ploy to sell books, it was a way to end my blog. I was going to start a new one. Then I realized that I will miss my online journal. I'm sorry I said fuck off to everyone. I don't mean it. I am just trying to keep the comments from hurting my feelings. I do deserve your cutting words. SB, I'm so sorry to hear you have given up on me. I understand. I should have thought of you.

I did generate a lot of interest. I'm sure I'll lose readers over this, but it is my journal after all, and I can do whatever I want.

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

That's totally true, you can do whatever the fuck you want.
I'll continue reading, truth or lies its still interesting what you write.

go to hell said...

Don't be sorry, be careful.

Telling the rest of us, except Gledwood, to go fuck off after we pined over you is proof that you just don't care.

You can always write another book, but you cannot always recover lost friendships.

Your horrible treatment to the rest of us makes you deserve absolutely no pity.

Causing us all to grieve over a lie of your death is unforgivable.

I still believe your Mom and Dad were in on this.

So fuck off sickie and stop blaming anyone else for your vile selfishness.

You could've said I'm deleting my blog, that wouldn't cause such anguish to us, but you had to be drama queen.

You are not poor. You are able to buy:
heroin and other drugs
Tinted contacts
100 thread count sheets
publish a book
live in Hawaii
trip to N.Y,etc.

p.s. your book is written like an illiterate

We're all not from Green Bay that will buy and read trash from a local.

Good luck.

Big Mac Junkie like you said...

pps
Delete this Fucking Blog that's full of bull shit.

you are not:

Interesting
or drug addict (you're a Burger King Whoper junkie)
or sexaholic
or intelligent
or genuine

You are just a pro as a con artist,full of lies and pushing your book that is as dull and stupid as you.

Were you really away because you were on a Whopper withdrawal?

btw,BK has a cuopon for a free whopper once a month so you can get your fix there.

bugerlugs63 said...

did Gledwood dictate that apology for you. some one did.
GO SHOOT YERSELF.
you might paint the wall with blood but there wont be no brains . . .just a heap of shit.
yes, u can do what you want. . .but it will be alone.
a lot of people really hate u now . . .thats all u have acheived. . well done

Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

p.s. your book is written like an illiterate.. i hope not one person buys it. u are in need of a rubber room you worthless slut piece of shit..

Anonymous said...

It's all here in one line:

"I did generate a lot of interest."

Only great artists works skyrocket after death.
Not some girl making up a heroin story.
Get over Kurt Cobain, that's an unhealthy obsession for you!

Anonymous said...

i would hate myself and want to die too if i was as selfish,spoilt,untalented,ugly,fat,manipulative and downright mean as you.

Anonymous said...

YOU FUCKERS why do you keep wasting time hating her?! oh she made you feel sooo bad by writing something that wasnt true?? stop paying her attention if you dont like her, leave her alone freaks.

I got no feeling for Anna said...

There is freedom of speech here so if we think she faked a heroin habit,a homeless guest in the house and her suicide, we can say so.

She says on the right bottom of the blog that she is a liar.
She should have said she is a liar, a user and someone who feels she needs nobody.
We'll see if that book of hers sells.

trish said...

Ok its a bit sick to fake your own death... still I think Anna is unwell and did not think the consequences through. She is just a human being like you and me and I think it is selfish to spit on and kick the ones that are already lying on the floor. When I think of 'evil' and 'hate' I think of rapists and sadists, definitely not Anna.

bugerlugs63 said...

trish,
Sadists yes indeed.
People who get plkeasure from causing pain to others . . .say no more
Anon; I aint no freak. It upset me. maybe i ova sensitive, and not the most mentally balanced (being an actual real addict) like GW and a lot of her readers. It propa upset me and sickened & disturbed me. I think she needed to know . . .fuks sake it weren't just a white lie was it . . .stop defending this disgusting behaviour.
Now she has started a new story at GW (where she knows there will be readers) of how she going to prison!!! . . .and they only sad thing about that is he beleives her . . . .UN fucking BELEIVABLE!!

bugerlugs63 said...

trish,
yes indeed sadists,
those who get pleasure in other peoples pain.
Say no more except 2 anon, I am no freak, I am sensitive yes, and prob not the most mentally balanced of people (being a true addict like GW and many other readers).
I felt sickened and disturbed by the whole thing.
It was not just some fucking white lie was it?
I think she needed to know how stupid this was.
But now she just starting a new lie over at GW (where she knows people will read it)
O I might be going to prison . . . .the only sad thing about that is people r beleiving it already . . . . . utterly UNBELEIVABLE

Bev said...

You're under your parents roof.
They wouldn't allow you to shoot up in their home.
I been reading this blog a long time and kept silent.
Now I will tell you you have pushed people away and pushed people aside like a kid whose tired of toys.
I'm not bothering to read your bull any longer.
Lies,lies,lies!
You're just a pile of lies.

bugerlugs63 said...

dint mean to send that twice . .first one dissapeared so i re wrote it then they both appeared.
Now I know u saying (over at GW) u not reading comments any more so people wont keep posting. . .but I dont believe that for one minute . . .I have written what I think this is all about over at GW under his "up,up & away" post, where u try to get sympathy about some imminent prison sentence for stealing your dads pills (as if!!)
as soon as u said "that homeless guy" got caught . . .I knew u were in on it . . .dont ask how, I just did . . .Then GW did me a favour by pointing out the news report . . .which explains a whole lot . .right down to why your suicide was on the 16th. I tell you somut, you aint gotta be clever to write . . but you have gotta be clever to lie . ..well, to make a lie believable, and to not get caught out in the detail. As I said at GW the truth will out and it will. your blog was riddled with in consistencies . .Joses clean . . .When i took J to his methadone clinic . .etc etc . .too boring to go on.
But this woman staying at Joses, who had only known him for a month . .who grassed him up to police about a previous robbery . .just to help him get banged up, or rather to help herself NOT get banged up, . . .well, well, what d'ya know about her???
or what d'ya think about her??

Gledwood said...

The times Anna said she was shooting up recently, her parents were in Arizona. She always did say she didn't use under their roof before that because she couldn't handle seeing their disappointment.

I don't think she thought the consequences through of pretending to be dead. Bear in mind she gets comments all the time telling her the world would be well rid of her if she died. I don't think she felt anyone apart from her family would really miss her. Turns out she was wrong, but I can kind of understand why she sounds so surprised, considering the kind of comments she used to get.

I never thought Anna had never used drugs (or at least never had a habit) the way some people do. It rang more true that there were times she had used interspersed by long periods when she didn't use and was probably dosing on methadone or Suboxone. Probably the times on methadone add up to longer than the times using street drugs. That is what I always thought.

Y'all have to bear in mind Anna's picture is on this blog, if you knew Green Bay you could pretty much find the apartment building. Her family probably read this. And nearly all junkies I have ever known lie in some circumstances about how much they use, how frequently, how, when or with who. Because the avalanche of disapproval just isn't worth it. Or just to protect The Guilty.

Anna if you got into all this trouble, why didn't you just post what really happened? It's much more interesting than dying. Death is final you know. I'm going to start calling you Lady Lazarus, after the Sylvia Plath poem in which she ponders and gloats on the suicide attempts she has survived.

Here is a much better Plath poem. INSOMNIAC

The night is only a sort of carbon paper,
Blueblack, with the much-poked periods of stars
Letting in the light, peephole after peephole --
A bonewhite light, like death, behind all things.
Under the eyes of the stars and the moon's rictus
He suffers his desert pillow, sleeplessness
Stretching its fine, irritating sand in all directions.

Over and over the old, granular movie
Exposes embarrassments--the mizzling days
Of childhood and adolescence, sticky with dreams,
Parental faces on tall stalks, alternately stern and tearful,
A garden of buggy rose that made him cry.
His forehead is bumpy as a sack of rocks.
Memories jostle each other for face-room like obsolete film stars.

He is immune to pills: red, purple, blue --
How they lit the tedium of the protracted evening!
Those sugary planets whose influence won for him
A life baptized in no-life for a while,
And the sweet, drugged waking of a forgetful baby.
Now the pills are worn-out and silly, like classical gods.
Their poppy-sleepy colors do him no good.

His head is a little interior of grey mirrors.
Each gesture flees immediately down an alley
Of diminishing perspectives, and its significance
Drains like water out the hole at the far end.
He lives without privacy in a lidless room,
The bald slots of his eyes stiffened wide-open
On the incessant heat-lightning flicker of situations.

Nightlong, in the granite yard, invisible cats
Have been howling like women, or damaged instruments.
Already he can feel daylight, his white disease,
Creeping up with her hatful of trivial repetitions.
The city is a map of cheerful twitters now,
And everywhere people, eyes mica-silver and blank,
Are riding to work in rows, as if recently brainwashed.


.

Gledwood said...

Anna I still can't believe you pretended to be dead. That really is ridiculous. What were you thinking? Why don't you post what really happened over that time. Something happened, I know it did.

Did I put up the right links yesterday to the right Jose who had done the armed robbery? That sounds like a right mess. Why don't you post on that? That's what people want to know about. What you have been involved in. What you are doing now. What you are going to do. Are you going to go back on methadone? Last you said you were technically clean. Anna you know in 10 years, apart from the ONE week and ONE day (8 days) during which I did Cold Turkey I have NEVER been opiate clean. I've been on methadone, subutex, heroin. Sometimes at very low amounts. I have a wonky tolerance to opiates that seems to go up and down quicker than other people's meaning when motivated I can cut down quickly. But this 8-day period aside, I have NEVER been off opiates ever since I started taking them regularly. I would urge you to stop and think and count your blessings. It's far better to be off drugs than on them. The longer you manage to stay opiate free, the longer your brain gets to put itself right. I've heard (loads of times) it usually takes about a year OFF all opiates to go "normal". You and I might never get "normal" but we can get BETTER.

Take care and POST SOMETHING NEW.

bugerlugs63 said...

yes to post what really happened (as GW suggests) would be a lot more interesting . .but it wouldn't sit very comfortably with your "poor little rich girl, that has been used for money & place to stay" image. Would it?
My best friend split with her man (maybe over the first robbery) so I helped him spend all the money on a 2/3 week binge. then when he went to get more money . . he got caught (so was no use to me any more) but as I was staying at his flat & implicated in some way . . .I thought it might be helpful (to the police) to put on my "innocent victim" head and help a little with their enquiries, also helping myself to go free (hopefully). . . .
Things usually niggle at me if they dont ring true, and carry on niggling until I get somewhere near the truth . . . .of course I wont know if this IS the truth yet . . .but its stopped niggling so . . .who knows?? maybe.
Obviously you gonna deny it . . .and I dont expect anyone to trust my "six sense". Thats all the same to me.
My anger was not at the lie, it was at your total lack of consideration for the many people who care about & love you (especially GW)
The minute I read the suicide note, I would have put money on it being a lie.
And now I would happily put money
on being right again . . . time will tell . . .you cannot prove black is white.
if you hate yourself so much that you are ashamed of the truth and feel a need to lie. Try changing the truth . . .not by lying . .but by changing,. You are still young & have so many people who care.

the guy in the silk taffeta dress said...

Good night Anna,
Everything blows over in time.
I know you must not have been yourself when you posted that shocker.
Why? No idea, but I still think you should have a 2nd chance.
I'm not being pragmatic, but I know you never criticized or gossiped here, so I think you're still a good person, who made a bad mistake.
Take care, rest up, forget.
j.

bugerlugs63 said...

Anna (one last thing) I promise!
I think if you came back with a new post . . .without 2 much detail . . .just that you were trying to get your self out of the shit . . .you would be just as amazed as u were at the amount of response to the "biggy".
You have a big following and I reckon most of those people would be straight back, in fact, they aint even gone anywhere
just a thought

Boomer said...

C'mon man we al wanna no bout dis arm robbery shit. You was holdin da gun or wat? You was da bitch in charge, yes? C'mon yo ho. Post da details.

PS yo o me $10. Pay me back wid dat ting ya do so well.

Valerie said...

Anna Dearest:

Oh deary me, Boomer's command of the Queen's English is getting shakier by the day.

Well it's a big hello from me, supping Long Island Iced Teas (with a gargantuan hit of China white on the side) here in our kookaburra and cockatoo filled back garden here in Melbourne, Southern Australia. Brucey cannot be riding the lawnmower today. His arse is still bruised from the crack-inspired minor road collision he was in last week. I was on the crack, driving a bloody great articulated truck (as you do) (latest heroin delivery). He was on that lawnmower, merrily trundling up the street, neighbours hanging out the windows in disapproval. We had to pay those bloody cops so much bribe money it was unreal. My 17 ct blue diamond is in jeapordy as we speak! Oh yeah that thing about it being GLASS was a damn lie. I'm a liar. You're a liar. Law of the jungle. Who fucking cares!

So you're not dead. That's good as I was thinking I was going to have to send over 2 guys with machine guns to collect on that 2-million milligrams neat Dilaudid you still OWE me for. At one dollar a milligram and a reasonable instalment plan, I'm sure we should be quits by early next year.

If not, and you're up for a move to Sydney, New South Wales, I've a cushy job coming up as Manageress/Hostess of a snazzy new polysexual brothel I'm opening up in the classy area down by the Harbour (near where I got arrested waiting for those 700kgs on that N Korean fucking ship to come in!). Anyway darling, you in your blue wig ~ you'd blow them punters away! You wouldn't ACTUALLY have to blow anyone, just shimmy up to Arab Princes, international tycoons, politicians etc say hello darling! Your usual?! Etc etc etc. I did that job for years. Fuckit what am I saying. I worked on my back. But I was IN the whorehouse wasn't I. Brucey arranges business, it's me who keeps the bitches in check. I run a tight ship me.

Now are you gonna tell us about this armed robbery escapade of yours or WHAT? Come on baby, it's what all your readers want to know. FULL. Details. Now. Please. Come ON...

Lots of love

your ever best friend

Val

XoXoXoX

Anonymous said...

Geeze. You are so fucked up to hurt the folks who wanted to be/are your friends.

You really fucked Gledwood over. And S.B., and others.

I had thought about buying about a dozen or so of your books, to pass along to friends. Not now...won't do it.

You are nothing but a fraud.
Your mother and daddy dearest as well.

I enjoyed reading you....you seemed honest. I was fooled, as well.

I hope you DON'T die. I also hope you DON'T live in your pathetic misery.

I hope you get better in your mind and in your life.