Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Relapse of 2011

I'm going to back to when I was using and not blogging because I was too busy finding money, buying dope, using dope, and repeat.  I will not be using real names to protect the guilty and Innocent.

A normal day for me consisted of me waking up sick, when I had my 700.00 dollars to spend, I would take a 100.00 dollars out and call my dealer and buy two bags. This was the main dealer that I went through, the only one I had the phone number to. The dealer would say he would be there in 20 mins. I would go outside and wait for him by Subway down the road from my parents condo. He never showed up on time. I would sit there for an hour sometimes. I smokes cigarettes after cigarette, sometime I would bring nook and try to read, but my mind too preoccupied. When the dealer showed up my eyes lit up like it was Christmas time. I would bring back to my parent's condo, and say I had to do number 2. I would then proceed to cook up my shot, and sink pop it. From using it so much my veins are all shot. The only ones still working are the one in my thigh, and my jugular. I could never find the on in my thigh, and after shooting up in my jugular a number of times it has hidden on me. I could no longer stick my finger in my mouth and blow and get it to stick out. It was still there if I poked around a bit,, but I was inpatient. I found I got just as high sink popping as I did main lining. It just took 2 to 3 mins to kick in.  I would shoot it in my ankles so I wouldn't have any bruises showing.

When my money ran out, I would So the dope costed 60.00 dollars. At this time I was writing out checks to myself from my parents account. I also stole their debit cards and would go to the ATM and get out as much money as could without being detected. I could usually get 50 dollars a day, so I would have to use half of what I was normally using. Then the money would run out for a few days, and I would have to go sick for three days. After that it was all in my head. Intense cravings, still a runny nose, watery eyes, sneezing and goose bumps, but not the aches and pain, and no longer shitting my pants. Then just when I thought I would never get high again, Ki Ki would buy a bag and share with me. I shared with her so often that  when she had money she would catch me back.

At first we would go to Sarah and Kevin's place to use, but after a while they has so many people in and out of there they go a paper letting them know they were considered a shooting gallery. At least that's what Sarah and Kevin told us. The did have a paper showing that Jose the guy who I was sort of seeing robbed a store at gun point. He squealed on Kevin and Sarah telling them it was just a shooting gallery up there. I won't lie it was sort of a shoot gallery. People coming in and out paying Kevin 5 bucks to shoot up in their house. After they saw that letter they wouldn't let anyone up there to shoot the dope. So Ki Ki and I started shoot up in the car.

The guy I had a connection with had consistently good dope, the stuff Ki Ki's people's dope. I mean sometimes they had great dope, but then they would get this white shit and it was purse shit. It didn't make you feel better. At least not for long.

Call my mom at 920-621-8598 or my dad at 920-609-8581 and they will tell you the hell I put them through in my years of active addiction. My dad considers being on Methadone as me still being addicted to dope, just a dope a Dr. prescribes.

This confusing thing where some of you think my mom is me, or I am my mom is just ridicules. I once accidentally posted on my mom's face book page and suddenly I am my mom, or my mom is me. call me Anna 920-660-5231 and see that I am really me. This is Anna Young's blog. I Anna Young write it. I did once lie about having a relapse when I was one suboxone, because I was losing readers being on suboxone and not having any interesting blog anymore. Then the death thing, and I admitted that.

I got on the Methadone clinic again because it gives me back my life. If you were to read my book you see that I was a full blown junkie.  I understand if you can't afford to buy the book, or if I Hate Myself and Want to Die is not your type of book.

I'm sick of being told that I've never been a full blown junkie before. If you read the book and get to the Hawaii part you see how bad I was really strung out. I sold my body for drugs and money. I even have a prostitution charge on my record. You think I wanted to fuck some old ugly men with uncircumcised cocks, and let them fuck me just for fun. Your sadly mistaken.

I guess I don't write passionately about my use on my blog because I put so much of it  in my book. So I'll never get those to believe me after my two lies on my blog. My dad might be mad that I gave out his phone number to have  bunch of people ask if I have ever been a full blown junkie.

I guess since I told all the haters to go away, they did. Since my stats are more than half what they used to be. Oh well. The people that do read, the larger percent of them read for more than an hour. 38% are less than 5 secs.

I still want to know why or why not you would or would not want to buy my book. I swear to you its a good book. Not the next great American memoir, just a good fast read. Its on sale on Amazon.com and on Barnsandnoble.com Its really cheap on nook, and kindle. Click linck to purchase a copy of I Hate Myself and Want to Die

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

I didn't think your spelling and grammar could get any worse, but apparently I was wrong. What are you doing differently? Are you running spellcheck but not bothering to make sure the program is using the word you actually meant? The past few blogs have been truly awful to try to read, like reading something put through Google Translate... Sink popping? Twice you posted sink popping. If you want more readers, if you want people to appreciate your writing, put a little effort into it. I don't understand how it is you are constantly reading, yet not picking up even basic grammar rules. It matters. You may think it doesn't, but it does. Fix it.

To answer your question, I wouldn't buy your book because it's poorly written, and poorly edited. I did read the sample, and it wasn't good. Oh, and by the way, "Midwest Prose" isn't a thing. It's a made up phrase from the people who published your book.

You could be a decent writer Anna, but you'd actually have to invest some time, and do some work. You need to go to the local community college and sign up for remedial, non-credit English Comp classes.

Anna Grace said...

I'm so sorry I didn't take my time to write this blog. I did write it on my blackberry. you try writing a post as long as mine using you blackberry.

As far as my book not being properly edited, when I posted the glimps of my book it was unedited. It was edited after I sent my book in to be edited. You have to buy the book to see that the grammer, and spelling are all correct in the book.

I'm not asking for more readers. Don't dis my book. Its a good book. If your going on what I posted over 6 months ago, before it was edited then you should shut your fingers down. YOu have no idea what your talking about.

I'll take the rest as constructive criizim. Sorry I don't have a computer right now to write my blogs on. On my black berry it automaticly changes words.

Spelling is not such a big deal. A lot of great writers are bad spellers. I'm working on my grammer I bought a book grammer for dummies.

You get that I was skin popping. So what's the diffrence?

Anna Young

Anonymous said...

See, the thing is, an author's blog can determine whether or not the public reading it will want to purchase the book. You write so poorly, and care so little about improving your style that nobody in their right mind would consider buying the book after reading this blog. Saying that it's a good book makes me laugh, especially when not too long ago you were pretending to be dead in order to peddle it.

Susie said...

I like your blog. But the reason I won't buy your book is because every last $ I have goes to feed my addiction. Right now, my face is watering and my skin is bumping and I'm miserable. I know what the life is like so I don't need to read it in a book. It'll make me feel even more shitty about myself. I'm sure it's a good book. Another reason is because I don't have the patience to sit down and read a book.

Anonymous said...

Anna,
Let me clarify. I read the excerpt that your publishers posted at their website. It isn't well edited. There are numerous grammatical errors in the post. Now I could download the first chapter for free onto my kindle, but I don't see the point. I just don't understand why someone who reads as much as you do can't see what everyone else sees when it comes to your writing. It's baffling.
And yes, I know it's a pain in the ass to write posts on mobile, all my comments come from my iPhone.
Anon1

Lucien said...

Darling, don't be discouraged - a lot of people reading your blog must be cowards & cheap asses.

It doesn't matter - the numbers/the readers.

Invest time in perfecting your craft.

You have talent.

So what if you can't spell properly all the time, that's what editors are for, for fucks sake! You CAN write that's what important.

Please, keep writing, telling your story.

I for one, adore your blog.

And as for these absolutely miserable fuckers trying to bring you down to their pathetic level: maybe they are encouraging you...in a twisted way.

Have a beautiful day.

Onwards & Upwards xx

bugerlugs63 said...

Quote; "I even have a prostitution charge on record" hmmm
You told us readers that you set out twice to try it and both times got pulled by cops before anything happened . . . So you may indeed have a charge for prostitution but thats about all. Lucky you.
Quote; "I have gone back to methadone to get my life back" Then why not just write about this life.
You ask for honest opinions and people take the time to think and write back. You dont seem to appreciate this, but rather to expect it. You react to negative comments or even constructive criticism on the defensive (ie shut your fingers down, you dont know what you're talking about)!!, but never to the positive ones with thanks or even acknowledgement. I think Gledwood helped a lot with the popularity of your blog . . but then, well we know what then.
I think you should think less about where half of your readers have gone and concentrate more on keeping the half you have left. I am trying to give you honest constructive advice. I only get an hour of an evening to write and I should be writing my own post on my own blog. I would stop begging people to buy the book and go live some life to write about. I hope thats not too harsh. Just another opinion. Take care.

Anonymous said...

I would like to thank everyone who had something positive to say. Those of you who are kind, with kind criticisms give me faith in myself!

With all my love
Anna Young

trish said...

i wouldn't buy your book because you kept saying how shit it is. that put me of.

May Witzmann said...

Who do you think would want to buy it?
I would not read it if you paid me.
Did you think it is easy writing a successful book?
It takes time and sacrifice.
Your book will never make it on a bestseller's list.
You put no thought into it and it's pretty late to be disappointed.
You needed to write a decent book before you got it self-published.

a real junkie knows better said...

pulease who wants a book by a fake junkie!grow up Anna and get a life.

Midnitefyrfly said...

i am not sure why some people who supposedly have so much lack of regard for your writing, take soooo much time to come here and give opinions. you can please some people all of the time, and all people some of the time, but you can't please all people all of the time. I come here because your writing is like an adventure and I never know what each day is going to bring. I don't much care what's real or what is imagined or exaggerated, I just take it for what it is.

Bev said...

I already bought the book.
I didn't get much out of it.
You go by the name of Miri Baker right?The book wasn't what I was expecting but it was different.
Sink popping.Tehe I thought you ment sink pooping harhar.

eyelick said...

Hm, neck lasted me quite a while, as in years, once position/angle/spots were memorized, quite easy to hit, despite the vein being invisible. Was disappointed when it died.

Anonymous said...

Anna, I wouldn't listen to any of the negative criticism that people post on here. Everyone wants to come on here and tell you how horrible your writing is...then why the fuck are they here reading it? How many of these people had the ambition and knowledge to actually get a book published like you did? My guess is not any. Much love!