Here is a general definition of Bi Polar disorder. I am considered Bi Polar 1 not 2. I tend to have a mixed state of emotions. I also have a disorder I've never once mentioned here on my blog or to anyone except my doctors, and parents. Hardly anybody knows about it. The funny thing is when I first started writing about my life with Bi Polar I was not going to mention the other diagnosis. Until a new reader, read a blog post I had written when I left blogger. She saw it right off the bat. She left a comment on the post saying she thought I might have this disorder, and should see a doctor and adjust my meds. I didn't respond. This disorder has a lot of stigma attached to it. Even Doctors sometimes treat you differently when your chart even mentions this diagnosis. So Ashley, you nailed it. I have borderline personality disorder. Just the fucking words, "personality disorder" make me want to puke. If I could get a hold of my medical records I'd take that diagnosis out. I've had doctors that have literally passed me onto another doctor because I had both bi polar 1 with psychotic symptoms, and borderline personality. People with a mental illness and a personality disorder are often described as untreatable. Neither can be cured, and both affect your mood. I was diagnosed with both Bi Polar and Borderline at the same time by the same doctor when I was hospitalized the second time for attempting suicide. My first suicide attempt I was diagnosed with severe depression and borderline personality disorder.
Gledwood, now you see why I never wanted to write about this subject.
(All the words underlined and colored are links, you can click on the word and learn more)
Bipolar disorder or bipolar affective disorder, historically known as manic-depressive disorder, is a psychiatric diagnosis that describes a category of mood disorders defined by the presence of one or more episodes of abnormally elevated energy levels, cognition, and mood with or without one or more depressive episodes. The elevated moods are clinically referred to as mania or, if milder, hypomania. Individuals who experience manic episodes also commonly experience depressive episodes, or symptoms, or a mixed state in which features of both mania and depression are present at the same time. These events are usually separated by periods of "normal" mood; but, in some individuals, depression and mania may rapidly alternate, which is known as rapid cycling. Severe manic episodes can sometimes lead to such psychotic symptoms as delusions and hallucinations. The disorder has been subdivided into bipolar I, bipolar II, cyclothymia, and other types, based on the nature and severity of mood episodes experienced; the range is often described as the bipolar spectrum.
Estimates of the lifetime prevalence of bipolar disorder vary, with studies typically giving values of the order of 1%, with higher figures given in studies with looser definitions of the condition. The onset of full symptoms generally occurs in late adolescence or young adulthood. Diagnosis is based on the person's self-reported experiences, as well as observed Episodes of abnormality are associated with distress and disruption and an elevated risk of suicide, especially during mixed and depressive episodes. In some cases, it can be a devastating long-lasting disorder. In others, it has also been associated with creativity, goal striving, and positive achievements. There is significant evidence to suggest that many people with creative talents have also suffered from some form of bipolar disorder. It is often suggested that creativity and bipolar disorder are linked
Borderline Personality Disorder aka BPD. Which is confusing Bi Polar Disorder is also BPD?
(BPD), (according to the ICD-10 World Health Organization disease classification, emotionally unstable personality disorder, borderline type), is a personality disorder marked by a prolonged disturbance of personality function, characterized by unusual variability and depth of moods. These moods may secondarily affect cognition and interpersonal relations.[n 1]
The disorder typically involves an unusual degree of instability in mood and black-and-white thinking, or splitting. BPD often manifests itself in idealization and devaluation episodes and chaotic and unstable interpersonal relationships, issues with self-image, identity, and behavior; as well as a disturbance in the individual's sense of self. In extreme cases, this disturbance in the sense of self can lead to periods of dissociation. It is only recognized by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV) in individuals over the age of 18; however, symptoms necessary to establish the disorder can also be found in adolescents.
Splitting in BPD includes a switch between idealizing and demonizing others. This, combined with mood disturbances, can undermine relationships with family, friends, and co-workers. BPD disturbances may also include harm to oneself. Without treatment, symptoms may worsen, leading (in extreme cases) to suicide attempts.[n 2]
There is an ongoing debate among clinicians and patients worldwide about terminology and the use of the word borderline,  and some have suggested that this disorder should be renamed. The ICD-10 manual has an alternative definition and terminology to this disorder, called Emotionally unstable personality disorder. There is related concern that the diagnosis of BPD stigmatizes people and supports discriminatory practices. Behavior.
Comorbid (co-occurring) conditions are common in BPD. When comparing individuals diagnosed with BPD to those diagnosed with other personality disorders, the former showed a higher rate of also meeting criteria for 
· anxiety disorders - the large majority of borderlines have an anxiety disorder
· mood disorders (including clinical depression and bipolar disorder) - the large majority, estimated to be around 96% of hospitalized borderlines have a mood disorder
· Substance abuse is a common problem in BPD, whether due to impulsivity or as a coping mechanism, and 50 percent to 70 percent of psychiatric inpatients with BPD have been found to meet criteria for a substance use disorder, especially alcohol dependence or abuse which is often combined with the abuse of other drugs.
A high proportion of people with BPD also have attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. The two conditions share some features, including impulsivity.
Borderline personality disorder and mood disorders often appear concurrently. Some features of borderline personality disorder may overlap with those of mood disorders, complicating the differential diagnostic assessment.HYPERLINK "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder" \l "cite_note-APAguide-39"HYPERLINK "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder" \l "cite_note-40" Both diagnoses involve symptoms commonly known as "mood swings." In borderline personality disorder, the term refers to the marked liability and reactivity of mood defined as emotional dysregulation. The behavior is typically in response to external psychosocial and intrapsychic stressors, and may arise or subside, or both, suddenly and dramatically and last for seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks or months. Bipolar depression is generally more pervasive with sleep and appetite disturbances, as well as a marked nonreactivity of mood, whereas mood with respect to borderline personality and co-occurring dysthymia remains markedly reactive and sleep disturbance not acute.
Some hold that BPD represents a subthreshold form of affective disorder,HYPERLINK "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder" \l "cite_note-44" while others maintain the categorical distinction between the disorders while noting they often co-occur.HYPERLINK "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder" \l "cite_note-46" Some findings suggest BPD lies on a bipolar spectrum, with a number of points of phenomenological and biological overlap between the affective lability criterion of borderline personality disorder and the extremely rapid cycling bipolar disorders.HYPERLINK "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder" \l "cite_note-48" Other findings suggest that the DSM-IV BPD diagnosis mixes up two sets of unrelated items—an affective instability dimension related to Bipolar-II, and an impulsivity dimension not related to Bipolar-II.
Now that I've ousted myself as a person with a personality disorder, some of things I've written here might make more sense to you. There are a lot of down sides to borderline personality. Impulsiveness for instants, I do things without thinking ALL the time. It’s always causing me problems. Also lying to the point of lying compulsively. I've worked on this part of Borderline Personality with my shrink extensively. The weird thing is, I lie about small stupid things almost always and there is no benefit for me in lie. I've asked over and over again why I have this compulsion to lie. All the shrink can tell me is it’s a coping mechanism that is particular to me. In romantic relationships I lie a lot because I'm afraid of being abandoned. My fear of abandonment is serious. I freak out and become irrational the second I think someone I love is going to leave me. I'm told This is usually brought on by some significant trauma in childhood. I'd say with the two close up suicides I witnessed as a child is the most likely cause of not just my abandonment issues, but also the cause of borderline personality disorder. The worst symptom for me is the need for immediate gratification. If I'm not immediately gratified I believe I've failed. This will cause me to become despondent. I won't want to try again because I wasn't immediatly gratified last time I tried. Another issue I've been working on extensivly with my thererapist.
As I mentioned I was first diagnosed with severe depression and BPD. Why did my diagnosis change the second time I was hospitalized? My mood swings were sever and the accompaniment of psychosis in manic state, and delusional thinking in sever depressive episodes, and in mixed episodes. Also the fact that my moods would change with no external stimuli and not in reaction to some thought etc. The fact that my sleep and appetite would change with my moods is also another reason my diagnosis was changed.
With these two diagnosis’s, I'm in a sort of catch 22 (just read the book Catch 22) Even if my bi polar meds do work and even out my mood swings, I'm still susceptible to the mood swings of a borderline personality for which there is no known medications to help stop or lessen the mood swings. This is why people like me are a doctor’s nightmare. Doctors want to solve problems by pushing pills. When a patient is immune to the medications what can they do, except advise the patient to get psychotherapy, and keep taking thier medications. "We'll switch them around to see if we get any positive results". If I had a dime for every time a doctor has said that to me, I'd be rich.
Gledwood kept wondering why my doctor would put me on Adderall when I'm Bi Polar, and I always said I don't know. Well I do know. People with BPD often have severe attention deficit disorder and hyper activity. Since my moods are going to swing no matter what, may as well help with the attention deficit.
So this is the beginning of a LONG essay I've written about my experiences with mental illness. Its 10 pages long on Word document with around 12 thousand words. So I've decided I'm going to divide this essay into parts, and post one part every week until the entire essay is on my blog. There will probably be around 12 posts, with around 1 thousand words to a post. If I were to copy and paste the rest of my essay (which doesn't include what I wrote before the Wikipedia information), this one post would take a person of average reading abilities at least two hours to read. Nobody would.